Guilt Trip
Nobody really prepares you for motherhood. You’re filled with the thoughts of snuggles and cuddles, but initially ignorant of the nagging, relentless voices that try to undermine your every decision as a parent. From day one you are filled with pressures from our loud, invasive culture and we just let them into our every decision through our devices inadvertently allowing uninvested people to have a say in the upbringing of our children.
Breast feed – Bottle Feed
Disposable Diapers – cloth diapers
Non organic – organic
Public school- Private School – Home School
Work- Stay at home
I’m not saying we don’t get wise counsel, but for goodness' sake stop posting so much and start praying. Being consistent in our walk with God no matter the circumstances we face is a much better guide than open forums of opinions. Do you realize that God handpicked you for your child? That means that you have exactly what you need to parent them when we remain in step with Christ. Here’s a news flash: you aren’t going to get it all right! Here’s another news flash: you don’t have to. Part of our jobs as parents is to fail well. What does that mean?
Apologize quickly.
Have open conversations.
Show our kids how to walk in humility.
Teach grace by living under grace ourselves.
This week my daughter graduates from high school and believe me the guilt trips are coming. Every flaw, mistake, and oversight is being brought to my tearful eyes as I’m facing the hard fact that my baby is about to go away and I can’t protect her anymore and I won’t have the same daily influence on her. I’m reminded of the times I had misplaced priorities, lost my temper, and placed undue pressure on fragile spaces. I have messed up as a mom. YET, I still have a wonderful daughter who overcame every obstacle, loves Jesus, and deeply loves and prioritizes her family.
A guilt trip will take you down a road of self-loathing, trying to please your kids instead of parenting them and it will land you in further regret! Instead, let’s allow the Word of God to shape us.
2 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV) We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
The truth is wherever I was deficient in parenting, God was sufficient! Wherever I was weak in my understanding, my Jesus was strong. So here’s my word to you, tell the guilt to go back to the pit it crawled out from. Stop beating yourself up and instead get up. You still have influence, no matter how young or old your child is. Jesus is a minister of reconciliation and there is a bridge that he is building to close the gap in your relationship with your child.
Today matters and you get to choose what road you travel on. The map of life is offering two guided tours “guilt trip” or “God trip”. I’m veering toward the God adventure of redemption and grace. I hope to meet you there!
